Pickle Juice Is Normal

So, I’m having an adult beverage with a pal and I order a Pickle Juice Martini, a lovely concoction made with vodka and pickle juice. My pal looks at me, says, “What?”

“Yes, I adore a pickle juice and vodka drink. It doesn’t have to be a martini. It can be in a whiskey glass with cracked ice or a single large round ice cube.” I dig a single large ice cube.

He looks for the lobotomy scars and says, “Nobody drinks pickle juice.” He is a confident, accomplished person whose opinion I usually respect, but this time he has wandered off the reservation. I tell him so.

Tito's Vodka Pickle Infusion Martini

Tito’s vodka is handmade in Austin By God Texas. I like mine in a whiskey glass with a sliver of dill pickle, but that’s just me.

[Three ounces Tito’s, one ounce pickle juice, one half ounce dry vermouth, shaken with cracked ice, strained into a chilled martini glass. Same approach but in a whiskey glass over ice with a few pickle chunks or spears. Your choice. Choose wisely.]

I beg to differ to differ with my pal and expound on the myriad of benefits of pickle juice drinking.

 1. Pickle juice has 10X the electrolytes in sports drinks.

 2. Those electrolytes ward off and fight muscle cramps. Take before and after a workout. It’s even kosher.

 3. Pickle juice is rich in nutrients. Who can get enough nutrients? Nobody.

 4. Pickle juice combats and alleviates the symptoms and pain from PMS.

 5. Pickle juice can help you lose weight, reduce body fat mass, and control blood pressure and blood sugar.

 6. Pickle juice is a hangover remedy.

 7. Sour old pickle juice can regulate your blood sugar which will blunt heart problems, kidney damage, loss of sight, and diabetes. <<< Never take medical advice from a damn car.

 8. Pickle juice will relieve heartburn. [I am a little doubtful on this one because I think it can cause heartburn.]

Where does one get pickle juice, Big Red Car?

OK, the easy answer is you buy it. Buy it from places like Brine Brothers.

Classic Dill

I personally have never bought pickle juice. I buy pickles, eat them, and save the juice in which they are packaged. My current inventory of pickle juice is shown below. One must be very careful around Carrera marble countertops as pickle juice will etch them.

As you can see, I do not play favorites. I like to take a salty swig of pickle juice from time to time.

Let me close by saying that taking a swig of pickle juice straight or in a martini, a whiskey sour, a bloody Mary, a margarita, or a Tito’s-pickle juice cocktail is perfectly normal as that term is currently used in the American version of English.

But, hey, what the Hell do I really know anyway? I’m just a Big Red Car. Please pass the pickle juice.