The Tee Ball, Special Olympics Presidential “Debate”

On Thursday, 27 June, at 9:00 PM Eastern Time, the country will be treated to a faux “debate” between two old white guys vying for the job as President of the United States (neither of whom have been formally nominated by their parties yet).

Let me tell you what this “debate” will NOT be: a rigorous discussion of the comparative policies and track records of two men, both of whom have held the job.

It will not be a comparision or display critical thinking on immigration, the open Southern border, taxation, the deficit, crime, law enforcement, race, foreign policy, terrorism, domestic policy, climate change, election security, poverty, education, the military, the economy, government spending,  Ukraine, Russia, the Middle East, China, global trade, the environment, electric vehicles, or crypto.

The United States has a commission that handles presidential debates, the Commission on Presidential Debates (a non-profit founded by the Democratic and Republican Parties in 1987 to ensure presidential and vice presidential debates during election years), but President Biden did not want to adhere to some of their time honored standards, so he took his football and went home.

When he and his football arrived home, President Biden challenged his opponent, former President Donald Trump, to a canned “debate” on CNN, a media outlet favorable to all things Joe Biden.

CNN, Big Red Car?

Yes, dear reader, one of the things President Biden insisted upon was a favorable media outlet and two well known Trump bashers to moderate, Jake Tapper and Dana Bash. Yes, I know, seems odd and unfair, but that’s the way it is.

The Biden debate will have some specific conditions:

 1. There will be a coin flip to decide who speaks first and last; and, where the speakers will be stationed behind their podiums (podii — for those who studied Latin?).

Joe Biden won the coin flip and selected the right side of the stage leaving Trump on the left and speaking last. Getting the last word seems tactically significant whilst right v left location seems irrelevant.

 2. Responses to questions from Jake Tapper and Dana Bash will be two minutes long. This is so dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

Who can’t summarize US policy in the Middle East or the Ukraine v Russia War in 120 seconds? 

 3. Whilst one candidate is speaking, the other candidate’s microphone will be muted.

 4. The “debate” will be 90 minutes long with two commercial interruptions. Big play here is whether Joe Biden — genial but elderly man that he is — can last 90 minutes or his meds will time out.

 5. Neither candidate may speak to staff during the breaks or bring notes to the “debate.”

 6. There will be no audience during the debate.

That isn’t a debate, Big Red Car, or is it?

No, dear reader, that is not a debate. A debate provides an opportunity for a candidate to express a view or a policy and for the opponent to critique that view or policy and suggest an alternative. This is just a silly public spectacle without any of the entertaining histrionics.

What do we really need, Big Red Car?

Ahhh, dear reader, that is the question, no?

Here’s what we need:

 1. Four two hour and thirty minute debates over four weeks each touching on specific concerns (the economy, trade, foreign policy including the military, domestic policy including immigration) moderated by a single person — different person for each session — not from the biased media.

 2. Each candidate would make a 5 minute introduction.

 3. Each candidate would have 15 minutes to present their views and policies on specific issues followed by a 30 minute free flowing critique of each other’s policies with questions from the moderator.

 There would be two of these sessions for a total of two hours.

 4. Each candidate would have ten minutes to summarize and conclude.

We desperately need to compare and contrast policy issues of two men who have both held the job of President. We owe it to the American people to take this serious and do a good job of it.

Bottom line it, Big Red Car

This presidential “debate” is a charade that will provide no real policy insights or rigorous discussion. It is a made-for-television beauty contest staged on a biased media outlet conducted by a couple of Trump bashers. 

I predict the moderators will spend a lot of time scolding Trump. Yawn.

But, hey, what the Hell do I really know anyway? I’m just a Big Red Car.