Big Red Car here.  Who cares about the freakin’ weather in Austin, Texas?  It’s March Madness, we care about the strength of our cable signal almost more than life itself.

The Boss got the Grande Communications 1 gig service recently.  The cable signal is strong.  It is fast.  Life is good.

Ladies, we spoke of the protocols of March Madness here — MARCH MADNESS For Women Only.  Go read it.  Make your man happy.  Please.  This will pay huge dividends in the future.

Yesterday was the happiest day in my life in a long, long, long time.  This is based on two simple facts.

1.  Duke was beaten like a red headed stepchild with a lisp by Mercer College.

2.  The Tar Heels squeaked out a win against Providence.

I will not even bore you with the final score.  In March, you win and advance or you lose and go home.  It is that simple.

The world is divided along the lines of you either love Duke and hate the Heels or you love the Heels and hate Duke.

The Boss, he hates Duke.

The Boss, he loves the Heels.

Today, The Boss is very, very, very, very happy.  It is a fleeting thing but there is almost no thrill better than looking at Duke on the losing end of the scoreboard and the Heels on the winning side.  Oh Happy Day!

[On a very serious note, know that if the Heels are ever eliminated, The Boss will switch his allegiance to the Dukies in a New York minute.  Yes, he hates them but he respects them.  They are worthy foes.  Their coach, the Rat, Mike “however you spell his name”, Coach K is a good guy except when he’s coaching against the Heels.  Then he is the representative on earth of Satan.  Harsh, you say?  No, accurate I say.]

There is no greater pleasure than watching the Rat in the waning minutes of a game his Dukies are going to lose.  I love watching those ratlike features defeated and beaten.

Sorry for being so mean today but March Madness is not the time to be a wimp.  Go Heels!

But, hey, what do I really know anyway?  I’m just a Big Red Car.