I have decided I will write about politics one day a week — maybe two, but definitely one — until the 2020 election. As you know, I predicted that Donald J Trump would win both the nomination and the election back in 2016.
Since his Inauguration, I have consistently held the position that I support some of his policies. I have previously described him as the political chemotherapy our nation needs. Chemo kills the bad cells before it kills the good cells. It is not really a compliment.
I only applaud policy, nothing else.
Today, I write about Mayor Pete Buttigieg (pronounced: “butt-edge-edge”) an exciting new Democrat candidate for his party’s nomination. Here is a picture of Mayor Pete threatening to poke Spartacus in the eye with his fingers.
“Booker, I’m going to stick these fingers in your eye!”
Mayor Pete, the Cliff Notes
Here is Mayor Pete:
1. Thirty-seven years old, making Beto one of the elder statesmen of the campaign and making Creepy Joe Biden and Bernie 40 years his senior. He self-describes as a Millennial. [You have to be 35 to run for President. It’s in the Constitution.]
2. Happily married gay man. His husband is Chasten Glezman Buttigieg, a teacher he met on Hinge. They have been married for five years. Chasten is a card with a obnoxiously cheery Twitter account. Yes, there will be a lot of “firsts” involved should Mayor Pete win.
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Chasten, this is what the competition looks like. You may want to pick up some new duds. Sorry, that was a little catty. Won’t happen again.
3. Guy is smart as Hell — Harvard College (BA History, Literature), eight languages (Norwegian, Spanish, Italian, Maltese, Arabic, Dari, French, English), Rhodes Scholar (Pembroke College First Class Honors in philosophy, politics, economics).
He has more languages than Melania. I admit to a little doubt about the accuracy of the eight languages claim.
4. Worked for McKinsey and Company as a consultant for three years.
5. US Navy Reserve Intelligence Officer with a seven month deployment in Afghanistan 2014 — combat veteran. Commissioned in 2009 and resigned his commission in 2017.
6. Owns two rescue dogs, Truman and Buddy. [Should have named second dog, Harry. Huge miss.]
7. Elected South Bend, Indiana Mayor with 74% of vote followed by re-election with 78% of vote. [Free pistachio ice cream only polls 70% in South Bend.]
Passed on third term in December 2018. Dropped out of race for Democrat National Committee Chairman.
8. 23 January 2019, Mayor Pete announced he was running for President as a Democrat.
9. Since announcing, Mayor Pete has raised $7,000,000 in campaign donations, putting him at the front of the fundraising race in the early innings. [Bernie says he raised $1,500,000 on the first day of his campaign and claims to have raised $10,000,000 since his announcement.]
Bit of an age difference between Mayor Pete and Senator Sanders — old, old, old white guy with laceration from a shower door on his head v new white guy sans lacerations. Can a white guy win the Dem nomination?
10. Mayor Pete has passed the threshold to participate in the first Dem debates. This will be fun.
Does Mayor Pete have the mojo, Big Red Car?
Here’s what I see:
1. Policy wonk with pretty standard lefty Dem views on things. Better delivery because Mayor Pete is a lot smarter than AOC. Still, it is the same old stuff.
If you’re smart as Hell and espouse the same stuff as the dumb candidates (talking to you Fauxohantus), what is the advantage of being smart?
2. Well rounded resume suffering only from terminal youth, something I predict he grows out of. We shall see. Love the guy’s education.
3. Served in the military. Won’t be a huge factor, but he can stick it in anybody’s nose who did not. The Dems won’t give him any points for it.
4. President Obama came into office in 2008 as an opponent of gay marriage. “I believe marriage is between a man and a woman. I am not in favor of gay marriage.”
On 9 May 2012, President Obama changed his stance to support gay marriage. “I’ve just concluded that for me personally it is important for me to go ahead and affirm that I think same-sex couples should be able to get married.”
In seven years, the country is now asked to embrace the prospect of a gay President and a gay First Gentleman. [Your Big Red Car could not give a shit about the subject. The law is the law. Drive on. Nothing to see here. Other than a commentary as to how fast society changes.]
5. Mayor Pete is late to the party and doesn’t have a national organization while Bernie and Biden (Bernie, Biden, Beto, Buttigieg — the four B’s) do. It takes a lot of time, money, people, organization to launch a national campaign. Fatal flaw.
6. The best political operatives already committed to candidates through the primary. It will be hard to get talent in Iowa and New Hampshire this late. That is just a harsh reality of the talent pool.
Come on, Big Red Car, bottom line it — does Mayor Pete win the nomination?
Sorry. No. He will be quite entertaining and he would rip Beto a new hole in his jeans if they ever tangled, but, NO, no cigar.
Big Red, does the guy ever become President?
Can’t say, but I would not rule it out. He has plenty of time to develop and serve. This is a very smart person.
And, now you know what the Big Red Car knows.
But, hey what the Hell do I really know anyway? I’m just a Big Red Car. Be good. Good luck, Mayor Pete. Thanks for your service, Squid. [Army guys call Navy guys “Squid.” It’s not a huge insult.]
